I woke up to shorebirds. I must be close to the sea. I walked through the parking lot; felt the pavement burning my bare feet. I stumble out eastward; pushed my way through the reeds. I woke up to shorebirds. I dreamed about drowning at sea. I'm staring out at nothing. Carolina coast. I'll wade through the shallows. It feels like I'm chasing your ghost. I think about drowning. I'd lay down and let go. I'll see you in heaven, everyone that left me alone. I reached in my pocket to pull out a light. Forgot I threw out my smokes weeks ago. I can't get it right, but I found your lilies. They're dead and they're dry. I'll plant them here seaside. I'll pray they come back to life. You and I. On the horizon, there's a boat fighting tide. All rust stained and pale blue, it's nearing the end of its life. But somehow it keeps floating, all banged up but alive. And I guess I feel better then. I won't lay down and die. I'm not coming home tonight without Dianne by my side.