Failure
King Missile

(spoken)
Give yourself over to the failure inside of you, and let it envelop your soul.

Failure is not out to get you. Failure wants to be your friend, the one you can count on when success, that is ever elusive, eludes you.

Failure is not out to fuck you. Failure wants you to fuck it—to fuck it all.

Failure wants you to be proud of your lack of accomplishments.

Failure wants you to own your own incompetence.

Failure wants you to be confident in your inability to do anything.

Failure doesn't want you to try; failure wants you to fail.

Failure wants you to get over your fear of failure—and what better way to do that than to fail and fail again?

If at first you don't succeed, fail and fail again.

And fail again.

And fail again.

And walk tall. And stand up, and say, I am a failure.

I am a failure.

I am a failure.

If it is difficult to do this—if it is difficult for you to think of yourself as a failure—if, for example, you have a good career, a nice place to live, a happy family, a lot of money, a sense of purpose, or belief that in the end, everything will all work out—remember all the things in your life you tried to do, but never, ever could.

Think of how when you were five, and you wanted to be an astronaut, and then the space program went into the toilet.

Think of how much you wanted to have sex with such and such a person, and you were rejected, or too shy to even try.Think of how many times in your life things didn't go your way, and remember: External forces are never to blame. You are the center of your universe, the only force that can ever affect you. Therefore, anything that doesn't work out for you is all your fault.

You are responsible for all of your successes, and the lack thereof. And that is the essential point that failure, your ever-faithful friend, wants to make: that your failure could not exist without you—without your stupidity, without your lies, without your mistakes, your uselessness, your lack of faith, your ineptitude, your unjustifiable confidence in your alleged abilities, you stupid loser—failure is your only friend. Failure is your only lover. Failure is your only hope.

So befriend it. Make love to it. And believe in it with all your might. Because failure is all there is for you.


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Lyrics by King Missile

  (Why Are We) Trapped?   A Good Hard Look   All Things Everywhere   And   Another Political Poem   Antimatter   At Dave's   Betrayal Takes Two   Bloodletting   Brains Will Explode   Cheesecake Truck   Chickens   Clamsauce   Clarity Transcending Choice   Columbus Day Weekend   Come Closer   Commercial   Damned If I Know   Delores   Despair   Detachable Penis   Dick   Eating People   Ed   Empty   Enjoy Your Tea   Everybody Screams Inside   Farm   Fish   Fluting On The Hump   Fourthly   Francis Bacon   Frightened And Freezing   Garbage Party   Gary And Melissa   Get Down with the Funky Shit   Get Into It (Roll Around in It)   Glass   Good Things   Happiness   Happy Hour   Happy Note   He Needed   Heaven   Heavy Holy Man   Hemopheliac Of Love   Hemophiliac of Love   How Much Longer   How To Remember Your Dreams   I Dare to Hope   I Wish   I'm Sorry   If Only   Jesus Was Way Cool   Jim   Juniper Dog   Knowledge   Leather Clown   Let's Have Sex   Lies   Life   Listen To Me   Lou   Love You More   Martin Scorsese   Martin Scorsese (PG-13)   Metanoia   Monks   Mr Johnson   Mr. Pomerantz   Mr. Story   My Heart Is A Flower   My Life   My Lover   My Personal Life   Nietzsche Sneezes   No Point   Now   Open Up   Pain & Pleasure   Phaedreaux   Pickaxe   Real Men   Royal Lunch   Scotland   Sensitive Artist   Sex With You   She Didn't Want   Shit   Sink   So Happy   Socks   Still the One   Stonehenge   Take Me Home   That Old Dog   The Absolute   The Adventures of Planky   The Birds   The Blood Song   The Box   The Boy Made Out of Bone China   The Bunny Who Wanted To Be A Rat   The Chosen   The Evil Children   The Fish That Played The Ponies   The God   The Indians   The Love Song   The Miracle Of Childbirth   The Neither World   The Party   The Sandbox   The Spanish Armada   The Story Of Willy   The Trees   The Way To Salvation   These People   Things   To Walk Among The Pigs   Tour Diary: Louisville   Up My Ass   Water   What If   When She Closed Her Eyes   Wind-Up Toys   Wuss   Ww3 Is A Giant Ice Cream Cone

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