1: 1 I am alive. I am a Man.
1: 2 I am the oldest man alive.
1: 3 I have been alive forever.
1: 4 I sit atop My mountain stronghold and I look down at the other men
at My feet and I laugh. I laugh at you. You, the Lesser Men, you,
whose lives flicker by Me like a cloud of? nets?
1: 5 You are born and you die as I open and close My eyes to blink.
1: 6 I watched as My slaves built for Me the Pyramids. I spoke the
words as they were carved onto the Rosetta stone. I watched as Rome
burned, as Pompeii was crushed and as the Twin Towers fell.
1: 7 I have always been. And I will always be. You may see Me, though
you will not know Me. You may see Me at the club, you may see Me on
the street, you will be dazzled by My golden chains, by My spinning
wheels, by My shining clothes.
1: 8 I have the biggest Hat in the world. It's got a million diamonds
hanging from its brim, it's been dyed the color that no painter has
ever been able to mix, and it could shade all the starving children of
the world at the same time.
1: 9 I live in the biggest house in the world. It's the size of a
hundred cities. I can sleep in a different room each night, and my
bedspread is woven from the hairs of Queens. I drive the fastest car
in the world, its seats are made from human skin. Its lights is
brighter than a billion suns and its windshield is made out of
diamonds and dreams.
1: 10 And oh yeah, I make the loudest beats in the world, when my kick
drum booms cities crumble and fall. So if you hear my music pumping
you're gonna get fucked up.
1: 11 I don't have a dick. I don't have a dick. I don't have a dick.
I don't have a dick.
1: 12 I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I
don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have
a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I
don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have
a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I
don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have
a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I
don't have a dick dick dick I don't dick I don't have.
1: 13 I get the finest ass in the world that gets lined up just to
smell my sweat. I can fuck a hundred people at once 'cause I can make
you come with my eyes.
1: 14 I have the biggest gun in the world, it can shoot out alright
through the Sun. It's like a million atom bombs in my hand while I
can shoot you in the head just for fun.
1: 15 I don't have a dick. I don't have a dick. I don't have a dick.
I don't have a dick.
1: 16 I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I
don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have
a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I
don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have
a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I
don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have
a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I
don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have a dick I don't have
a dick I don't have a dick.
2: 1 This song is not a metaphor. I do not mean this symbolically. I
literally don't have a dick. This is my actual physical condition. I
am missing the biological male reproductive organ. I do not have a
vagina in its place, I am now and has always been male. I did not
once have a dick and lose it by my choice or otherwise, nor will I
ever have one. I am not feminized by this lack. Do not take this to
mean that I lack for phallos in the psychoanalytic sense, I am not
powerless, I am not sterile. It is from overcompensation from my
dicklessness that I have achieved authority and omnipotense. I am not
great and powerful Because I don't have a dick. I am great and
powerful And I don't have a dick. This does not make me anti-dick. I
am not suggesting the removal of dicks and I do not advocate
castration. This is merely an explanation of a coincidental fact.
For Me, posessing or not posessing a dick affects absolutely nothing.
I am simply revealing to You, the Listener, through the song my actual
biological state. So now that We understand each other, sing with Me
the Four Tenents of Our new Civization.
2: 2 POWER. HONOR. AMBITION. FUTURE.
2: 3 POWER, no dick. HONOR, no dick. AMBITION, no dick. FUTURE, no
dick.
2: 4 I don't have a dick. I don't have a dick. I don't have a dick.
I don't have a dick.
2: 5 I don't have a dick dick dick. I don't have a dick dick dick. I
don't have a dick dick dick. I don't have a di-i-ick. I don't have a
di-i-ick. I don't have a di-i-ick. I don't have a di-i-ick. I don't
have a di-i-ick.
I Don't Have a Dick
Captain Ahab
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Lyrics by Captain Ahab
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