Bridie was teaching out in Carysfort
I was working in the bank
2 pay checks every Friday
And a Morris Minor out the back
But I was mad for jigs and reels
Drinking dirty big pints of stout
When the Bank of Ireland gave me the boot
They said, Don't let the door hit your ass
On the way out
Fiddlee, diddlee, deidely, dee
I was born to play the funky céilÃ
Over the seas and far away, off to America
Fiddlee, diddlee, deidely, dee
Where the wild, wild women were waitin' for me
Think of me, bridie
Whenever you see me there on your MTV
I love you, a cushla but how could I be
Without me punky, funky céilÃ
Bridie broke down and started to bawl
When I told her about me divorce from the bank
She said I've got news of me own a stor
I'm 2 months late, it's not with the rent
She said I'd have to be tellin' her da
So we drove the Morris Minor to Cork
The ould fella said You've got two choices
Castration or a one way ticket to New York
So here I am up on Bainbridge Avenue
Still in one piece but glad I'm alive
Drinking dirty big glasses of porter
Playin' me jigs and me reels and me slides
Think of you, Bridie, whenever I'm sober
Which isn't too often, I have to confess
Take good care of the Morris Minor
Bad luck to your da
And give the baby a great big kiss
From his daddy in the Bronx
Oh Bridie, I'm still crazy about you, girl
Does the baby look like me, Bridie?
Has he have red hair and glasses?
Oh, Bridie, sell the Morris Minor
Come on out to America, girl
The pubs never close over here
I've got a palace up on Bainbridge Avenue
I've got the biggest bed in the world, girl
We can stay in it and make babies forever